Khaan, you damned idiot, you done went an' ratted us out, now everbody is hip to the scene! Speaking of rats, rodents, a dang mouse just scurried by, I'm gonna have to call him mouseibor.
Our pleasure, Dave! I/we could afford it because, in a fit of rage, the decision was made to tell the insurance agent to stuff their crazy premium increase up in a very dark place. $4,400 . . . it ain't happening.
Thank you for helping these kids out, you tried your best and it is a lot more than your critics have probably done for anyone in their lives. So glad you call them out when they leave, good riddance. At least you know what it takes to be a real friend to someone. It is rare to find someone like that in this world. I would share on Twitter but I make a point of going in there for less than 5 minutes but will repost the next time I am there.
New commenter, lawyer from Massachusetts. I love your stuff, even if it is a little more bawdy than my taste. I learn something from every article and laugh out loud a lot.
Your writing is fantastic - always interesting, original and keeps the reader's interest to the end. When I write legal docs I try to do that too, instead of, "Now comes the movant herein, who hereby references the...blah blah.
One of the best reasons to read your writing - apart from the sheer enjoyment of it - is that you long ago saw through the ineffective attempts by Republicans to advance their cause, and how they are really closer to Democrat positions than they are to the beliefs of the regular schlubs in the party.
Regarding your wistful ruminations about your book aborning: With self-publishing these days, you could probably get your new book out there on some platform or another.
Finally, I'll never unsub. Keep up the good work, and good luck on the book.
What a wonderful comment, Gregory. Really lifted my spirits, so I thank you! And thank you for being a reader (and not unsubbing!). BTW, I'm the only non-lawyer or doctor among the males in my family (and 50% of the females). My cousin was one of the attorneys on the infamous Dow Corning breast implant class action suit in the 1990s. True story - his name is Dick. I swear, I'm not trying to be bawdy! That's the 100% truth.
The Bruce's Beach thing makes me laugh. Never let a good deed (especially the misguided ones) go unpunished, right? One of my favorite things you do, David, is bring attention to the well meaning morons who shoot themselves in both feet and their dick in an effort to be seen as righteous and virtuous. Please keep tracking these and share them with us!
“In July of this year, Lincoln Memorial Park was one of two cemeteries targeted by copper thieves in the same week. More than 120 nameplates were stolen that night.”
The irony just writes itself! When black crime is stealing nameplates out of the cemetery…of dead black people…I want to say something glib like “Well, we’ve come full circle”! But even that doesn’t do it Justice.
Third world shithole, here we come! Grave robbers!?!?
Carson is one of the few remaining non-gentrified cities in that area. It's zoned for gambling, so the shady guys behind those establishments don't want nice houses and schools going up, because then residents will want the card clubs gone.
Oh damn! That's the fire where everyone WANTED to yell "homophobia," but the suspect was a bitter gay who'd been booted. And now they can't yell "racist" at the theft.
"That's the fire where everyone WANTED to yell "homophobia,"" oh, they still do. Someone tried to win an argument with me by posted an "anti-gay hate crimes" list that began with the Upstairs Lounge, not knowing I worked a few blocks from the building. There were lots of bars in New Orleans that couldn't have passed a fire code, but the cops or the mob were paid off; I went to a few of them, but thankfully no bitter queens showed up with a Molotov. "And now they can't yell "racist" at the theft." They wanted so badly for it to be a fat coonass in a MAGA hat so they could loop it on CNN for a month. If they could believe rednecks were roaming Northside Chicago looking for black gay actors to lynch, they were salivating for the theft to fit the narrative.
I remember reading your article along those lines and I had a little beef with it. I said to myself: "Christ is for All", ... but, Mang, we must have picked up some junk along the way!
I will admit to being totally lost by the unsubs. Perhaps they dislike photography? Maybe they don't understand that the words "porn girl" are not technically pornography? Who knows? I've been making cracks here and there about exploding pagers, but you got me with "worst blow job ever". That might be my favorite line out of this week's Week. Hezbollocks was almost as amusing as, well, exploding pagers. Them Jews be pretty smart. Another note of confusion here. How does a dog convey that it is gender fluid?
This reminded me of an odd phenomenon I'd noticed with my brother (four kids, married 30+ years, suburban Tidewater Virginia). He becomes irrationally incensed whenever I try to tell him about Kera and our daysail with Mark or anything else involving Kera, assuming I am trying to hint at (wink wink) wild paid sex, even though no such thing is remotely implied. And by incensed, I mean enraged to the point of screaming and forbidding further mention.
Related?
Like you, Dave, I once got the feeling of what my life would’ve been like had I gone the family route. This occurred in the mid-90s when I shared a townhouse with a single mom and her preteen daughter for two and a half years. After the novelty wore off, it confirmed the wisdom of my decision not to do so. Oh, and single mom promptly moved out once she found out how little money I actually made at that time.
Great job as usual! Did you see that lolbertarian nutjob was a big thing last week because of how he handled a visit from the feds (Gee, wonder why they showed up? Calling for the assassination of elected officials?). An even funnier note: the guy was pirating content from Mark Steyn on his Odyssey social media channel awhile back and he was forced to take legal action to make him stop.
wow unreal people unsubscribed for "porn girl" content. I am more closed-minded than average and often clueless but even I understood porn-girl story as good deed (and funny - the story about buying her Christmas themed lingerie to die (laughing) for.
Plus it would have made a great sit-com, especially with a story-based theme-song like Giligan's Island. Brad Pitt would play lead . . .
I hardly ever comment but I'm a regular reader. Anything short an endorsement of Kamala is fine with me. I mean, I'll even accept a Jill Stein endorsement.
Keith- I'm w/ you on that! My bestest, oldest friend has a discreet "Harris for President" sticker on her car. I find it extremely troubling. I can't get behind any of them, but Harris???
Dave tells Holocaust truths, gets his ass beat, porch catches on fire.
Dave fakes his own demise.
Dave gets betrayed, by a female.
Dave then is ostracized, banned, blacklisted, banished into outer darkness.
Dave subsequently ends up on Takimag & Substack: WHEEE!!! I'm FREEEE !!!!
The easily offended dutifully UNTHUBSCRIBE en masse, because Dave is, in fact, a humanitarian.
Dave can't catch a break, yet he still lives, and writes, giving his loyal readers much joy and food for thought.
Dave's saga continues . . .
Hopefully Substack won't find out about my dual subscription ploy, I would hate to be UNTHUBBED!
Thank you for the beers, my good friend. It REALLY made my weekend! Very much appreciated.
And of course, thank you for your readership. "Both" of you!
You will be discreet, and not mention my schizophrenia to anyone?
Khaan, you damned idiot, you done went an' ratted us out, now everbody is hip to the scene! Speaking of rats, rodents, a dang mouse just scurried by, I'm gonna have to call him mouseibor.
Our pleasure, Dave! I/we could afford it because, in a fit of rage, the decision was made to tell the insurance agent to stuff their crazy premium increase up in a very dark place. $4,400 . . . it ain't happening.
> "The easily offended dutifully UNTHUBSCRIBE en masse, because Dave is, in fact, a humanitarian."
If pressed to define with one line only, that would be it. You've nailed it! (But don't forget to wash your veggies)
Thank you for helping these kids out, you tried your best and it is a lot more than your critics have probably done for anyone in their lives. So glad you call them out when they leave, good riddance. At least you know what it takes to be a real friend to someone. It is rare to find someone like that in this world. I would share on Twitter but I make a point of going in there for less than 5 minutes but will repost the next time I am there.
Much appreciated (for everything, Gina).
New commenter, lawyer from Massachusetts. I love your stuff, even if it is a little more bawdy than my taste. I learn something from every article and laugh out loud a lot.
Your writing is fantastic - always interesting, original and keeps the reader's interest to the end. When I write legal docs I try to do that too, instead of, "Now comes the movant herein, who hereby references the...blah blah.
One of the best reasons to read your writing - apart from the sheer enjoyment of it - is that you long ago saw through the ineffective attempts by Republicans to advance their cause, and how they are really closer to Democrat positions than they are to the beliefs of the regular schlubs in the party.
Regarding your wistful ruminations about your book aborning: With self-publishing these days, you could probably get your new book out there on some platform or another.
Finally, I'll never unsub. Keep up the good work, and good luck on the book.
What a wonderful comment, Gregory. Really lifted my spirits, so I thank you! And thank you for being a reader (and not unsubbing!). BTW, I'm the only non-lawyer or doctor among the males in my family (and 50% of the females). My cousin was one of the attorneys on the infamous Dow Corning breast implant class action suit in the 1990s. True story - his name is Dick. I swear, I'm not trying to be bawdy! That's the 100% truth.
Of course that would HAVE to be his name. Glad I could lift your spirits after all the enjoyment you have provided to me over the years.
The Bruce's Beach thing makes me laugh. Never let a good deed (especially the misguided ones) go unpunished, right? One of my favorite things you do, David, is bring attention to the well meaning morons who shoot themselves in both feet and their dick in an effort to be seen as righteous and virtuous. Please keep tracking these and share them with us!
I think the "Ellen Pagers" was very droll. Do take care of yourself.
Thank you!
And THANK YOU for the beers, my friend!
I’m telling you man, the sub-unsubs are a PsyOp by Big Jewry! Don’t let it mess with your head!
Makes sense Mike!
“In July of this year, Lincoln Memorial Park was one of two cemeteries targeted by copper thieves in the same week. More than 120 nameplates were stolen that night.”
The irony just writes itself! When black crime is stealing nameplates out of the cemetery…of dead black people…I want to say something glib like “Well, we’ve come full circle”! But even that doesn’t do it Justice.
Third world shithole, here we come! Grave robbers!?!?
Carson is one of the few remaining non-gentrified cities in that area. It's zoned for gambling, so the shady guys behind those establishments don't want nice houses and schools going up, because then residents will want the card clubs gone.
A blacks stealin' placks story from my neck of the woods: https://www.wwltv.com/article/news/local/upstairs-lounge-plaque-stolen/289-7d49610c-0674-4638-b5e2-eb80d9c7bc44
Oh damn! That's the fire where everyone WANTED to yell "homophobia," but the suspect was a bitter gay who'd been booted. And now they can't yell "racist" at the theft.
"That's the fire where everyone WANTED to yell "homophobia,"" oh, they still do. Someone tried to win an argument with me by posted an "anti-gay hate crimes" list that began with the Upstairs Lounge, not knowing I worked a few blocks from the building. There were lots of bars in New Orleans that couldn't have passed a fire code, but the cops or the mob were paid off; I went to a few of them, but thankfully no bitter queens showed up with a Molotov. "And now they can't yell "racist" at the theft." They wanted so badly for it to be a fat coonass in a MAGA hat so they could loop it on CNN for a month. If they could believe rednecks were roaming Northside Chicago looking for black gay actors to lynch, they were salivating for the theft to fit the narrative.
ain't it the troof?
Maybe we should just have a "no plaque" law? Sub-titled "This is why we can't have nice things!"
Why am I not surprised that it was in New Orleans? What a shithole.
If it was a white guy who did it, the NOPD would've sprung into action. If a brotha does it, dat's because he po'.
I’m here! I don’t abandon ship no matter how confused I am with people taking umbrage with your posts.
My favorite readers stay. That's all that matters!
We love you Dave! Obviously those losers just don't get you!!
In the end, it's never quantity but quality, and I have GREAT readers (like you).
I remember reading your article along those lines and I had a little beef with it. I said to myself: "Christ is for All", ... but, Mang, we must have picked up some junk along the way!
I will admit to being totally lost by the unsubs. Perhaps they dislike photography? Maybe they don't understand that the words "porn girl" are not technically pornography? Who knows? I've been making cracks here and there about exploding pagers, but you got me with "worst blow job ever". That might be my favorite line out of this week's Week. Hezbollocks was almost as amusing as, well, exploding pagers. Them Jews be pretty smart. Another note of confusion here. How does a dog convey that it is gender fluid?
"How does a dog convey that it is gender fluid?"
Sometimes you give the dog a bone, sometimes he gives it to you.
Resist temptation. Resist temptation. Resist temptation. Oh, the hell with it. Throw me a bone, Dave. Sorry if I make any old ladies unthub.
LOL!!!!!!
Loved the John Wilkes Booth reference and the line about Yelp reviews.
Very kind of you to help the lovely porn girl's brother obtain the needed medical procedure.
This reminded me of an odd phenomenon I'd noticed with my brother (four kids, married 30+ years, suburban Tidewater Virginia). He becomes irrationally incensed whenever I try to tell him about Kera and our daysail with Mark or anything else involving Kera, assuming I am trying to hint at (wink wink) wild paid sex, even though no such thing is remotely implied. And by incensed, I mean enraged to the point of screaming and forbidding further mention.
Related?
Like you, Dave, I once got the feeling of what my life would’ve been like had I gone the family route. This occurred in the mid-90s when I shared a townhouse with a single mom and her preteen daughter for two and a half years. After the novelty wore off, it confirmed the wisdom of my decision not to do so. Oh, and single mom promptly moved out once she found out how little money I actually made at that time.
Indeed...no regrets! No alimony, no child support, and no regrets.
Great job as usual! Did you see that lolbertarian nutjob was a big thing last week because of how he handled a visit from the feds (Gee, wonder why they showed up? Calling for the assassination of elected officials?). An even funnier note: the guy was pirating content from Mark Steyn on his Odyssey social media channel awhile back and he was forced to take legal action to make him stop.
Taxation is theft! Pirating IP... Not so much.
LOL!!!!! I didn't know that additional detail. Hilarious!
wow unreal people unsubscribed for "porn girl" content. I am more closed-minded than average and often clueless but even I understood porn-girl story as good deed (and funny - the story about buying her Christmas themed lingerie to die (laughing) for.
Plus it would have made a great sit-com, especially with a story-based theme-song like Giligan's Island. Brad Pitt would play lead . . .
actually- she looks like she could be Brad Pitt's kid sister (or kid!)
"Our Simpsons Ride car was the only one equipped with airbags." Did she shoot Krusty over cold fries?
Dude, that heifer don't need a gun; she's a walking mudslide. Even the Aberfan disaster fears crossing her.
Maybe she killed him over the Krusty's Komedy Klassics episode.
LOL!
Ridin' that track,
Cole in the back,
Krusty Jones you better
Watch your speed,
Bending the rail,
From an ebony whale,
This ride must be very racist, indeed...
LOL!!!!!
"Bending the Rail..........."
"...from an Ebony Whale"
LOL!________Excellent!
I hardly ever comment but I'm a regular reader. Anything short an endorsement of Kamala is fine with me. I mean, I'll even accept a Jill Stein endorsement.
Keith- I'm w/ you on that! My bestest, oldest friend has a discreet "Harris for President" sticker on her car. I find it extremely troubling. I can't get behind any of them, but Harris???
The epitaphs were hilarious. I imagined myself walking through the graveyard, laughing.